Day +32 - The Things That I Used To Do
The old Guitar Slim song (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fj33EGMbazY) ran through my mind a few times today. Starting with a bit of a lie-in (till nearly 7, we're not talking of lunch in bed), I left Susan to take Sam to school. By the time she returned, I was ready to take a walk at JBL (the soccer fields). Almost felt capable of 2 laps but settled for one and a half with an extended walk around the pavilion to stretch it a bit. Feeling full of energy / joys of spring when I got home, I packaged up a couple of recent ebay sales and then settled down to the real task of the day - fixing the string in one of the living room cellular blinds. (We have cordless ones in the master bathroom and, if I ever put these things in again, I will consider cordless.) [Closer inspection reveals that they are not cordless at all but that the cords are inside the blinds and spring loaded so your chances of repairing them must be very close to zero.] I had bodged the blind when the string broke a couple of weeks ago - OK, maybe 6 weeks ago - but overnight temperatures are heading for seasonal tonight so we don't want one blind with a 6" gap under it.
Step 1 - get clever and look up instructions on the internet - "distrammel the flanging header from the cross-trussock". And "rather than fix your old blinds, why not replace with some new ones?" Because we've got 7 of the bloody things at $100+ each whereas a lump of string cost $4.95 including shipping. (Lowe's will happily sell you a grandsworth of blinds but you can get stuffed if you want a to buy a couple of bucksworth of string). OK, bugger the online instructions.
Step 2 - take down blind. I have done this so many times I can do it with my eyes closed.
Step 3 - major disassembly, remembering to put tiny bits somewhere safe.
Step 4 - discover that the original string in the blind is halfway between the thicknesses of the two skeins of blind string I bought. Decide to use the thicker one but first, a five minute break which I convince myself is because I need to rehydrate..
Step 5 - thread blind string though enormous eye of tapestry needle. Discover that minor shakes in both hands look like an earthquake when you're trying to thread a needle, even one with an eye you could get a camel through. Abandon needle and contemplate trip to AC Moore to buy one with enormouser eye.
Step 6 - get fishing line and tie it around blind cord using a clove hitch.
Step 7 - ridiculously optimistically push fishing line down 4" deep hole that the old blind cord went through. Refrain from passing out with amazement when it actually goes through. Pull fishing line until blind cord comes through.
Step 8 - thread blind cord through small plastic washer and tie a knot in it to keep it in place. This took fifteen minutes, courtesy of aforementioned shaking hands
Step 9 - re-assemble everything only to discover that the cord gripper in the top of the blind will only grip the new thick string.
Step 10 - briefly - unbelievable briefly - consider taking the whole lot apart and putting thicker string in place of the original string that didn't break
Step 11 - re-hang blind
Step 12 - crumple exhausted into armchair. Really? A bloody hour to do that? Good grief.
Step 1 - get clever and look up instructions on the internet - "distrammel the flanging header from the cross-trussock". And "rather than fix your old blinds, why not replace with some new ones?" Because we've got 7 of the bloody things at $100+ each whereas a lump of string cost $4.95 including shipping. (Lowe's will happily sell you a grandsworth of blinds but you can get stuffed if you want a to buy a couple of bucksworth of string). OK, bugger the online instructions.
Step 2 - take down blind. I have done this so many times I can do it with my eyes closed.
Step 3 - major disassembly, remembering to put tiny bits somewhere safe.
Step 4 - discover that the original string in the blind is halfway between the thicknesses of the two skeins of blind string I bought. Decide to use the thicker one but first, a five minute break which I convince myself is because I need to rehydrate..
Step 5 - thread blind string though enormous eye of tapestry needle. Discover that minor shakes in both hands look like an earthquake when you're trying to thread a needle, even one with an eye you could get a camel through. Abandon needle and contemplate trip to AC Moore to buy one with enormouser eye.
Step 6 - get fishing line and tie it around blind cord using a clove hitch.
Step 7 - ridiculously optimistically push fishing line down 4" deep hole that the old blind cord went through. Refrain from passing out with amazement when it actually goes through. Pull fishing line until blind cord comes through.
Step 8 - thread blind cord through small plastic washer and tie a knot in it to keep it in place. This took fifteen minutes, courtesy of aforementioned shaking hands
Step 9 - re-assemble everything only to discover that the cord gripper in the top of the blind will only grip the new thick string.
Step 10 - briefly - unbelievable briefly - consider taking the whole lot apart and putting thicker string in place of the original string that didn't break
Step 11 - re-hang blind
Step 12 - crumple exhausted into armchair. Really? A bloody hour to do that? Good grief.
Your description of blind re-stringing is a lot more fun than Sid's mutterings about putting a new battery pack in his mouse. Distrammel, indeed. Of course, old skinflint won't shell out for a proper pack, just binds up two ordinary Duracells with Sellotape.
ReplyDeleteAlways wondered who I got my skinflint streak from. Must be a leftover from WWII "Make do and mend".
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